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主題 : 考博作文批改范例一
級別: 初級博友
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樓主  發表于: 2011-04-16   
來源于 考博資料 分類

考博作文批改范例一

考博批改范例: Z%OW5]q  
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Keeping Healthy (題目是固定的,不要隨便更改,用給出的題目good health) yPN+W8}f  
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With the sharply quickening economy(這句話的表達很別扭,不符合語法結構,可以改成with the fast development of economy), both the (這里沒有特指,所以刪掉定冠詞)students and people who has (注意主謂一致,用have)been aready (拼寫錯誤)working for a long time confront much heavier burden than before. Mojority (拼寫錯誤)of them have to keep tightening (這里表示高度集中用keep concentrating)all the time so that they have no time care ( to care) their health. however(注意句首要大寫), it is significant to prevent us from illness because a perfect body could be a necessary tool for a successful creer(拼寫career). l|q%%W0  
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In my veiw(拼寫), much can be done to kee (拼寫)fit. on(注意大寫) the one hand, when we finish the work, making some practice (做些運動用doing some exercises更好)is a good way to burn the energy(不應該是消耗你的精力,充其量也就是脂肪吧,所以不如直接寫keep fit好一點). We should keep(keep沒有花費時間的用法,用spend time in doing) at least half an hour doing some sports. A wonderful body can give us a (精神不可數,所以刪掉冠詞,不定冠詞只用在可數名詞單數前面)good spirit. On the other hand, a rational diet is another measure to keep not only healthy but also beautiful. $''UlWK  
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For myself(用賓格形式me), swimming and running are the main exercese (注意拼寫,用復數形式). Usually, I do not eat much high energy food like KFC. In a word, a good health is the most important for every one. 5z Kqb  
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